Change is good ...

My Roomie and I have been sharing my place for over a year now. It was a surprisingly easy transition particularly given I had lived alone for years, but we are both pretty laid back and it worked out well.  I liked her being here, I realised (or was that admitted) that I actually don't like living alone, who knew I had been kidding myself for so long :) 

Late last year wheels were set in motion for my Roomie's Wife to apply for a spousal visa so that she could move from the US to the UK, their marriage in Canada is legally recognised over here and once the visa was granted in January plans were made for the big move to take place in March.  

The plan was for them both to stay with me for as long as it worked out for us all, I was happy that I was able to help them settle here and was genuinely excited about the move but at the same time I was feeling apprehensive.  They would be together, as a couple, which was how I had always known them, but it was still a strange feeling.  I wanted them to be comfortable living here but so did I, and my apprehension came from wondering how the dynamics would change.  

Some of my friends were wary, they wanted to make sure I wasn’t being taking advantage of, I was touched by their concern, and assured them that I would see how things went and would change the arrangement if it didn’t work out.

March arrived and the Wife did too. It was a huge step for someone who had not really travelled out of the US until the Roomie moved to the UK. We did what we could to help her fit in, mixing up a combination of trips out with just staying home so that some routine could be established.  

Six weeks in and things are going well, living under the same roof has not been hard and I don’t feel like my life has been completely disrupted.  I am pretty relaxed and glad they are here.  I am fairly sure they are happy too and whilst I would fully understand it if they decided they wanted their own space and chose to move I already know I would miss them. 

That'll be me ... out again...

I was talking to my Mum the other day when she asked whether I was going to let the kittens have babies and whilst there is no doubt they would be beautiful I told her no. I said that J (my roomie) probably would not let me give any away and so I would end up with the whole litter. Mum suddenly asked who J was so I explained, again, and that was more or less the end of our conversation.

A week or so later whilst talking to my sister I asked whether Mum had mentioned the conversation we had about the kittens and apparently she had. In fact she went further, she asked my sister whether J and I were a couple. Just like that. My sister said we weren't and that she thought J was either married or about to be married.

This weekend I visited Mum and can confess to feeling more than a little apprehensive, wondering whether she would actually say anything to me, it really could have gone either way. Anyway, she didn't and as my niece was there I didn’t say anything either.

Last night, I called Mum to let her know that I had managed to find something that she had been looking in the shops for and we chatted for a while.

Then out of nowhere I asked the question, why had she asked my sister whether J and I were a couple. She got angry, saying that my sister was just stirring things up, that she had no right to tell me and that she had only been joking and hadn't meant anything by it. Damn, I hadn’t intended to get my sister in trouble.

I let her rant for a while before telling her that J and I were not a couple and that she is, in fact, married, that it was her wedding I recently went to in Canada. She was still raging, that red headed temper hasn't faded much over the years that is for sure, so I told her that I wasn't offended by her comments and just because J wasn’t my girlfriend didn’t mean that anyone wouldn’t be.

Just like that, it was done, no turning back...

Mum's immediate reaction was unexpected, she talked about my cousin having a girlfriend who she likes talking too, and she told me it wasn't really anyone else's business. We talked a while longer though now I can’t really remember too much about the conversation but I was sure she couldn’t wait for me to get off the phone so she could talk about what I had told her.

I called my sister to apologise for dropping her in it; she laughed it off and said she would let me know what happened when she visited Mum today.

I am still waiting to hear ... and getting anxious all over again … seriously why won’t the phone just ring...

Has anyone found my mind, it seems to be missing ...

I am spending the holidays in the US this year so had to get myself organised, with a much appreciated push from my roomie I am all set, presents are all bought and wrapped, tree is up and decorated, cards written and posted.  I admit it, I was starting to feel a little smug when friends and colleagues would mention that they needed to start their shopping and asked how I was doing and I could say I was all done.  The look on the faces of people who know me well is priceless :)

Anyway, a couple of days ago I was driving home from work and somehow missed a call from my brother, then a short while later, my sister called.  As I answered she was already laughing and asked if I had heard from my brother lately.  I explained the missed call and she said, "well he called me earlier and asked if you were losing your mind so obviously I asked why. He then went on to say that he had just received a christmas card from you and thet you had addressed it to him and Sue".  Sue is my brother's ex-wife, they have been divorced for almost 20 years and he has been with his partner Vicky for about 12 years.

Seriously, I can't beleive I did that.  I havent called my brother back yet but I have posted him a new card, and checked it twice to make sure it is addressed correctly.

A little later on the same day I was in the bathroom looking in the mirror at the shirt i was wearing thinking something didn't look quite right, the buttons looked a little strange.  And then I realised, it was inside out!!!  It was 11pm at this point, I had been to work, for the entire day, been home all evening and not one single person had mentioned it to me. In my defence, I was wearing a cardigan which covered most of the shirt.

I am so ready for my holiday, just one more week of work to go, yay.

    

Halloween ...

The kitties joined in the Halloween celebrations in their own special way ...

I cheated my way through my first ever pumpkin carving by using a pumpkin carving kit, though I was still impressed with my attempt especially as I hate spiders ...

My house mate put me to shame with her much more complicated effort ...

And I don't really want to mention the free hand carving she did the following day.... I didn't get a picture but it was fabulous. 

We invited a couple of friends and their children round for dinner, then asked another couple, suddenly we were having a 'party' with  11 adults and 8 children expected. So dinner plans had to be quickly changed.  We improvised well, laying out salads, breads, slow roasted lamb stuffed with garlic and rosemary, garlic and herb roast chicken, baked brie and a fabulous cheese and onion quiche all served up buffet style. 

Aside from my fairy god son all of the other children were girls, oh my goodness, I did not know that they could make so much noise just playing with a few balloons, they had an absolute riot though and I was pleased that they had so much fun.

There were party bags filled with sweets and treats for the children, but the big surprise of the night was that we had made party bags for the adults too, single serve size bottles of wine, ready mixed cans of Vodka and Cranberry juice, a packet of Doritos, a  packet of Panadol, our friends are still talking about those, who knew these would be such a hit.   

Not one but two weddings ...

Last month I went to my niece's wedding, it was a beautiful blue sky day, the service was held where they had hoped it would be in a tiny old church in a quaint village in the berkshire countryside and the reception took place on a boat cruising up the river Thames.  The bride looked, as expected, stunning but the children almost stole her limelight, this picture makes me smile every time I see it.

  My niece's step daughter, her brothers son and her husbands 2 nephews.

At the beginning of this month I headed over to Canada took to attend the wedding of two friends in Niagara, arriving at the hotel I was keen to get my first view of the falls and rushed to the window.  The first of many rainbow's, now that was a good sign.

Again  it was a beautiful blue sky day, the service was simple, stylish and small, held in their hotel suite with the Falls as their backdrop, they both looked fabulous and so happy.

It was an honour to have been there as one of their witnesses and their friend.

Too full ...

Occasionally I need space, space to move around, unrestricted, and empty of people, empty of mess, just empty I guess. 

I don't need it for long but if I cant satisfy the need when it arises, I feel anxious, claustrophobic, angry even. 

Recently I had one of those days, there were people everywhere, mostly, but not all, were where they were expected to be.

I woke early to sounds of people sleeping echoing throughout an otherwise quiet house.

As usual my movement bought the kittens running from whatever corner they had curled up in so I headed downstairs to take care of their morning ritual.

I immediately notice that luggage seemed to have exploded from one of the bedrooms into the hallway overnight.

Downstairs the kitchen was cluttered, piles of clean laundry, clean glasses were balanced with dirty cups and dishes were spread across the counter top.  One of the kittens had a poorly tummy so dealing with the litter box was more challenging than normal.  

In no time the kitchen was straightened and I walked though the dining room.

The table was covered in bags and sweaters, dropped there when we returned home tired and happy from our day out.

Then I noticed ... the thing that pushed me over the edge ... someone sleeping on the sofa ...

I didn't agree to that when I said he could spend the night ...
    when I was asked late in the evening ...
    when there was really no other option ...
    leaving me feeling manipulated.

I had expected to settle on the sofa, with a cup of tea, to enjoy some solitude before the day unfolded. 

Instead, I returned to my bedroom, and my mood began to darken ...

I am not used to that, that  lack of space, of feeling that I was restricted to my room, like a teenager.

I felt myself getting angrier as the minutes passed, I felt trapped.

And worse, I felt guilty,  guilty for feeling like that, guilty for getting snapping, guilty for reacting that way

It took almost the entire day for me to feel calm and relaxed again, I was left feeling emotionally and physically drained.  Thank goodness this doesnt happen often.

Spoils ...

Well, the Women's Rugby World Cup is over for another 4 years :(

England made it all the way to the final playing against New Zealand (a repeat of the previous 2 world cup finals) and after a long, hard fought game lost (a repeat of the previous 2 world cup finals, grrrrr) by 1 penalty which gave New Zealand a 3 point lead and final score of 13-10.  

It was a great game to be watching live with friends, in fact I really enjoyed all of the games we were fortunate to get to see, it was a little bit strange to be seen as the resident expert of the game, but I had fun explaining the rules that I knew and making up the ones I wasnt so sure off, just kidding :)

There was a fabulous atmosphere in a stadium for the final with an attendance of around 13,000.  Two young girls (probably around 4 and 6) sitting with their parents right behind us screamed and shouted non stop, along with the rest of us, cheering England along at the top of their voices, I know how sore my throat was the next day so I dont need to imagine how they must have felt. 

There was even the obligatory 'streaker' who cartwheeled naked across the pitch during half time, she was clearly very fit as she hurdeled the barrier when she reached the other side, I has happy I stayed in my seat during the break and didn't miss the 'show'.  Funny, they didnt seem to show her on the TV, and yes we did specifically check when we got home, LOL 

I had a small wager with 8thDay on the result of the England/USA pool game, a game we won quite convincingly, however, it was probably the hardest fought game in our group and the points scored didnt really reflect how good the US team were. 

That said, we still won and not a person to welsh on a wager 8thDay quickly hit both the store and the Post Office because look what I received, Ha Ha, I am a little bit scared by this but J is over the moon.  Thank You!!